The first time you start to solve problems together you are going to realize something in a hurry — you and your spouse are different.

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God made us different on purpose. Remember: When two people are just alike, one of them is not needed. Most people get married thinking they married someone just like them. They say, “We’re so alike!” But they don’t realize that opposites usually attract. Sure, you may have similar personalities or dispositions, but men and women think, see and feel differently. The easiest way to explain this is that we have a different way of processing things.

There’s a reason for that!

Men and women are different. If we clearly understand our differences, they can become an asset.

They are a gift from God. When we communicate, it shouldn’t be about winning an argument; it should be about solving a problem. The benefit is that our differences give us different strengths. We are to use those strengths to build each other up, not to tear each other down. Part of understanding our differences as husbands and wives is taking time to understand how each other communicates.




Don’t attack your spouse’s areas of weakness. Instead, use your strengths to help them. Each of us has strengths and weaknesses. That’s why two are better than one, because they can help each other!

This post is taken directly from Joe’s new small group resource, Marriage Building 101. Learn more and start your own small group for marriage. 

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